Irritated and infatuated. Odd combo?

Today has been a struggle a bit, but it hasn't really been a "terrible" day. I've been irritated with almost everything today. People, things. The only thing I can take is my dogs and J.

I have a killer headache. Gah, I don't know. I didn't sleep well last night (I was sick all night) and I don't know. BLAH.

I just want to be alone with quiet. Just me. And quiet.

I'm such an asshole.

As for infatuated...not only am I head over heels for Ray William Johnson, I'm also head over heels for Gerard Butler. After watching 300, I thought his body was the most gorgeous thing I'd ever seen. But that's not why I liked him (though it helped). He is such a child at heart and when he laughs...his smile is infectious.

I don't know. I like the weirdest people.

Spongebob, Weed, Ray and Friends

Today was one of the better days.

Went to J's with A, and got high all day. Came home and started watching Spongebob. Now I'm stalking Ray William Johnson for the day and waking up (I was falling asleep). So now A and I are going to do what we always do and we analyze our personalities.

HAHAHA The Iron Butt.

Let me do a Ray appreciation:

I love this man. I'm still investigating him. IN LOVE. On his show, he's this funny charismatic guy. In real life he's an introverted, socially anxious guy who's really short (Apparently 5 foot 5 or something and all is friends are like 6 foot 3 or taller).

Crushing >hard< on Ray William Johnson?

I think I might really like him. Which SUCKS for him cause there's about to be some major stalking on my part. And in my research I found some things out about him.

- He's actually very introverted.
- He doesn't like physical contact with people.
- HE'S SO TINY. He's short and skinny. XD
- I think he works a lot harder than we think he does.
- He is a manic depressive and has anxiety.

Here's a poem/lyrics he wrote:

They say I’m crazy
But I can’t necessarily say they’re wrong
Sometimes I rap the same verse twice in the same song
‘cause I’m losing it
‘cause I’m un-stable
You don’t know me, and I’m just guessin
That you didn’t know I’m a manic depressive
And that I also take pills for my generalized anxiety
I know I ain’t perfect, but in everybody’s eyes I try to be
just normal, but everybody stares at me
And if I’m so normal then why do I need therapy?
The Xanax and the Paxil turn me into a zombie
And I’m probably not that sick. I’m just a fucking hypochondriac
I don’t talk about it, just deal with it quietly
Drinkin Captian Morgan just to deal with anxiety
Some times I think of things I really wish I didn’t think of…

I respect him so much for putting this out there so his viewers could understand him better. Like how he does thing people don't understand. Poor baby.

If you DON'T know who he is (DO YOU LIVE UNDER A ROCK!?), he is the most subscribed person on Youtube. He's made it big, I'm so proud of him. A huge fan, and I think I love him.

Oh, and I ship Lance and Ray. Just saying.